Simpson which was the style at the time

Abe and Homer have never really seen eye-to-eye as father and son. When Homer was younger, Abe was a domineering and strict father who didn't give Homer a lot of love. As an adult, Homer is very dismissive of his father and his old man ways. But that doesn't mean Abe can't give his son some advice.

After Homer and Marge encounter some sensitive marital trouble, Abe picks up on it and questions Homer if there is a problem with their sex life. Homer is understandably turned off by the discussion, especially the hilariously drawn-out way Abe pronounces " seeeeeeeeeex. Abe certainly does like to tell a good story, even if it's a story that doesn't actually go anywhere.

Abe even seems to acknowledge the rambling nature of his stories which are filled with historical inaccuracies. Yet he tells them anyway. His story about taking the ferry to Shelbyville is an especially long-winded tale that keeps veering off course into ridiculous tangents.

We're not sure how an onion could even be worn on a belt let alone become popular fashion. After experiencing so many adventures that may or may not have happened , Abe often laments that he is now considered an old and useless old man. This sometimes inspires him to get active again, only to realize he does not understand modern society.

In an attempt to get back in the workforce, Abe takes a job at Krusty Burger but even fast food goes way over his head. While working the drive-thru window, a customer asks for French fries. Abe's wonderfully confused response suggests he really doesn't get out much. Abe is not always the easiest person to get along with, but like everyone, he is looking for someone to spend his days with. He's had a few romances in his time, but one of the more serious and unusual was when he fell for Marge's mother.

Abe obviously doesn't feel this way about every girl he meets. As he tries to make sense of this strange feeling before finally realizing it's love. Soon they'll have written the greatest novel known to man. Let's see. It was the best of times, it was the, "blurst", of times?! You stupid monkey! Burns : Now, let's get down to business. Homer's Brain : Oh, man. I have to go to the bathroom. Why did I have all that beer and coffee and watermelon? Burns : Now, Homer, I know what you're thinking.

I want to take the pressure off. Now, it doesn't take a "whiz" to know that you're looking out for "Number One". Well, listen to me, and you'll make a big splash very soon. Homer : Which way to the bathroom? Burns : Oh, it's the twenty-third door on the left. Homer runs into a long corridor and begins checking every room. Homer : Nope After Homer returns. Burns : Find the bathroom alright? Homer : Uh Grampa : We can't bust heads like we used to.

But we have our ways. One trick is to tell stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for m'shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt.

Which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. Gimme five bees for a quarter, you'd say. Now where was I The important thing was that I had an onion tied to my belt, which was the style at the time.

You couldn't get white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones Burns : Look at them all, through the darkness I am bringing. They're not sad at all. They're actually singing. They sing without juicers. They sing without blenders. They sing without flungers, cabdabblers, and smendlers! Through the security feed, Burns observes Homer doing a series of twisting motions.

Burns : Look at him, Smithers. Exercising away. While the others are off at the candy machine. In the next shot, it is revealed that Homer is fruitlessly trying to reach a candy bar that got stuck to his back.

Homer : Hey, Lenny, can you get this Sugar Daddy off my back? Lenny : Okay, but it's the last time! Burns : Simpson, eh? New man? Smithers : Well sir, he thwarted your campaign for governor , you ran over his son , he saved the plant from meltdown and his wife painted you in the nude Burns : Doesn't ring a bell.

Homer : What does this job pay? Carl : Nothing. Homer : D'oh! Sure, I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious, but the answer is no! Burns : Now, let's get down to business. Homer : [thinks] Oh, man. I have to go to the bathroom. Why did I have all that beer and coffee and watermelon? Burns : Now Homer, I know what you're thinking. I want to take the pressure off. Now, it doesn't take a 'whiz' to know that you're looking out for 'Number One'. Well, listen to me, and you'll make a big splash very soon.

Burns is reminiscing about his grandfather's old Atom Smashing Plant]. Burns' Grandfather : Come on, come on, crack those atoms! You there, turn out your pockets. Burns' Grandfather : Atoms! One, two, three, four SIX of them! Take him away! Waif : You can't treat the working man this way! One day we'll form a union, and get the fair and equitable treatment we deserve!

Then we'll go too far, and get corrupt and shiftless, and the Japanese will eat us alive! Burns' Grandfather : The Japanese? Those sandal-wearing goldfish tenders? Ta ha! Burns : Oh, if only we'd listened to that boy, instead of walling him up in the abandoned coke oven.

Homer : Who is it? Male Voice : Goons. Homer : Who? Male Voice : Hired goons. Homer : [opening door] Hired Goons? One steps back into the doorway and shakes his tie. They take him to Burns' Mansion]. Burns : Ah, Homer. I hope "Crusher" and "Low Blow" didn't hurt you. Homer : Y'know, you could have just called me. Burns : Oh yes, but the telephone is so impersonal. I prefer the hands-on touch you only get with hired goons. Homer : Hired Goons?

Homer : Hey, what does this job pay?